Thursday, May 28, 2009

Red Bull Music Academy London 2010: Applications end on July 29, 2009

It’s that time of the year again; time to get your thinking caps, because the applications for the Red Bull Music Academy 2010 are well under way.

The next edition of the Red Bull Music Academy will touch down in one of the world’s most sprawling musical metropolises: London. From February 7 to March 12, 2010, some of the most original and creative minds in music will come together to share ideas, work on tunes, and perform in the best vibe-filled venues around town.

Are you ready to chase that creative spark and take a step on the road to your new next level? Applications end on July 27, 2009 so best get cracking.

You can download the application form right now, here’s the link:

Red Bull Music Academy London 2010: Application Form

Otherwise if you want more info on the actual Academy, head over to the RBMA official website:


If you want more info on how to get your application to one of your local Red Bull reps who will send it to the Red Bull Music Academy in Germany, e-mail Richard at richard.rumney@redbullmusicacademy.com

Now for some music. These tracks were made at the Red Bull Music Academy in Barcelona last year and they’re a super dope example of what you can get up to while you’re at the Academy.

Firstly, there’s the tech-house brilliance of Cape Town’s Thibo Tazz and Zolcan Breaker. It’s strictly for the upbeat dancefloors.

Thibo Tazz and Zolcan Breaker - Tech Kids

But if you really want to get a taste of the music from the academy and the actual academy itself check out "Analogue" by Ireland Jazz-tech man Rory D, Drum n Bass godfather DJ Zinc and Tom Oberheim, one the pioneers of analogue synthesis. The track is an evocative piece of dancefloor electronica with Tom Oberheim musing about analogue synthesis on top. It’s an amazing piece of music that is equal parts floor shaking goodness and a lesson in electronic music history. Grab this while you can:

Rory D, Zinc and Tom Oberheim - Analogue

The truth is that we're drowning.

Sometimes, we get sick of the blue acrylic carpet and the LED scroller.

WITS THEATRE 14:1- "Dan, we have to leave."

We leave the murky depths and sweat through harsh sunlight, Dan's mirrored and my scratched lenses hiding our pupils. We take the long way around, under the bridge and along the pavements, until the basketball courts rise: chainlinked and shady before us. Around the corner that always, always smells like poes and through the awkwardly small gate - excuse me, your eyes are bloodred; excuse me, your lips are stained with resin. Through the dust and ominous haze we stumble, clearly Art Students, clearly young, clearly obvious, to the man with the highest turban and the quickest tongue - shooting out "more fire"s and "jah peace"s and "herbal healing aiiight"s. Wrapped in fruity papers - green mint, brown chocolate, little printed blueberries and the ever vile yellow banana that I always, always make him put back in his pocket. Ok, Part One is complete, we are on our way out of this place.

Part Two - call the man with the four/four high hat tshtsh-ing in his soul and the nice clean shoes taptap-ing on your face. Under and down and around again, through the half-squat AliceInWonderland door, until you're standing under the florescent light and the ventilation duct breathes sickly beside you. The trachea of the beast: squarely silver and eyelessly watching. Toke by toke, reality reclines. They're talking about walls that eat paint. Eat it. You're starting to worry, streching cos it feels niiiiice, pointing your toes and counting the beats - impulse:twothreefour:onetwothreefour-onetwo.threefour spin:fall:spin:push...

The tabacco mixed in has made your head rush up and out and your stomach curl around itself. "Leeney, your bag...". Always, always, "your bag...". Turn out the light and run before the trachea pops out an eye and Sees. Out of Wonderland, around, up, over... the trees are extremely evergreen out here.

Mr FourFour goes back to work, Dan leaves, I put my bag on a bench and unwrap my headphones from their kittensleep.
The whole point is, after dismissing WITS THEATRE HH:MM, I chose Ital Tek.

Another boywonder from Brighton, the 22yearold DJ/producer signed to Planet Mu Records (home of Boxcutter, Neil Landstrum, Frog Pocket, Benga and Venetian Snares...) in 2007 after his productions posted on Myspace (remember that?) caught the right kind of attention. His debut full length, Cyclical, got people saying things like "atmospheric dubstep soundscapes" and his new EP, Massive Error (released earlier this month), is going to get them saying a whole lot more.

Robots from the future came back in time. The war between robots and humans reached breaking point; there was no way for us both to survive. It wasnt us or them, it was all or nothing. Now, I'm not saying its right, what they did - those robots - but I'm not saying its all that wrong either. They came back. The time travelling machines we thought we'd destroyed... the Convention broken...hundreds of years back in time, 2009: just before techno music gave us more knowledge than we could handle. They sunk us - they submerged us. We're underwater. The robots sunk us under gallons of clear water, ensuring our subservience, censuring our destructions. Sure this isn't politics, I dont know if it was right or wrong, I dont know if they'll be punished or rewarded.

But i do know this: Ital Tek knows. Massive Error points out that trees sway very heavily these days. Have you seen how people are more and more and more like fish? Have you noticed how its easier to walk more slowly, as long as you dont try to stop? It means we're underwater. It means the robots put us here. It means, i know its dubstep but its also tech-y and glitchy and almost but not quite broken. Its terrifying.

The beat clicks and crunches, walking casually over dried up locusts who may, at any point, in fact be alive and judder upward to suffocate you and everyone you love. Luckily, the bass and the melody wont let that happen - you're underwater, and so are the locusts. They dont start and they dont end, they roll and they gain and they give. This is the kind of dubstep that reminds me why I, womanly, really like dubstep. Its not the boyish agression and overflowing testosterone of Rusko et al, and its not the flakey ragga of Tes La Rock either. Its male like God is male; its actually your father. It knew about what the robots had done before you even knew they were real. And even though its strong, its gentle. Like waves - yes, like sine waves but also like waves translate this deep under water.

The title track, "Massive Error", is really all about the robots. The bass and beat are serrated but not sharp, more unified here than the locusts and currents that exemplify more of Ital Tek's arrangements. As the unity expands and fattens, psychedelic, dubby melodies skirt surfaces: More and more action-adventure, swords and lasers, until the gameplaying climaxes is a blipping overbubble... before the bass slides back in, deep and endless and supported again by the cleanly popping drum beat.

The more dance-friendly "Octa" sits on a steady this...thi-thisthis drumandbassy beat, giving more scope to those patently atmostpheric, infintely O-ed swoooooops and woooooops and flooooops. This is typical Ital Tek, at once obvious and sly.

By now I'm walking a little bit too fast down the cement hill, WITS THEATRE 14:58 awaiting my return. A girl stops to tell me i look "whimsical". I pass over my headphones, playing the EPs final offering, "Ghost Clouds" - cold and wet and mostly hopeless. I'm not sure if she understood about the robots, but she walked away more slowly than before.

Ital Tek - Massive Error (MediaFire)

Ital Tek - Ghost Clouds (MediaFire)


Ital Tek - Bun-E Mix (right click save as)


Flying Lotus - Orbit 405
Neil Landstrumm & Si Begg - A £20 to get home
Zomby - The Lie
Vex'd - Pop Pop VIP
Various Production - Chief
Scuba - Ruptured (Surgeon Remix)
TRG - Put you down
Squarepusher - Abacus 2
Zomby - Euphoria
Iannis Xanikis - Orient Occident
Harmonic 313 - Dirtbox
Remarc - Thunderclap
Ital Tek - Octa

Wednesday, May 27, 2009

Parties: !DIRTY!DIRTY! (Friday, May 29, Johannesburg)

Press Release:




FRIDAY 29 MAY 2009







So there you have it, it's gonna be rawkus!

Here are some pre-party exclusives (all at 320kbps goodness), courtesy of one of the DJs playing on the night, Data Takashi:

La Roux - Bulletproof (Foamo remix) (MediaFire)

Major Lazer - Hold The Line (Edu K remix) (MediaFire)

Mental Cut - Late Que To En Passando (Dakunt & Stinj Kuduro Edit) (MediaFire)

Chelley - Took the Night (Rizzla's Cunty Refix) (MediaFire)


Professor Murder - Hot Patty (Feat. Sandy Smith) (MediaFire)

If you haven't already ('cause it somehow eluded you), join !DIRTY!DIRTY! on Facebook HERE.
And to make sure you don't get lost, check out the map under the photo section of the event on Facebook here.

Saturday, May 23, 2009

Safety First

Everybody needs to feel safe sometimes. Wellingtons keep your socks safe from puddles and hats keep your head safe from pieces of falling sky. Alarms keep cars safe and fences keep houses safe and condoms keep your ovaries safe. But nothing plastic or felt or sonar or metal or latex will keep your soul safe.

Its ok though - that's Andrew's job.

Cosseted in dense wallpaper and filthy maroon carpeting, Lord Kitchener's Carvery is what your great granny's womb looked like a decade after menopause hit. Cracked, torn, burnt and sticky benches run the length of the walls, inhabited by Regulars and boring people and cool people who are only sitting down for a moment because its not cool to sit, its only cool to dance. The Regulars are cool. They're ready to Chat. They want you to be a Regular too. Actually, I want you to be a Regular too. There was one Regular - a woman (dyke), as far as i know her name was 'Tiz' - who wanted to know about where i jol. Yes, jol. At Kitchener's Carvery, you can't help but jol.

The comforting sour smell of the table cloths aside, the DJs were playing techno music.

The night kicked off with Yoji, whose new and young and doesn't play techno. Another time, Yoji.

For once i won't be ripping my literary panties about Data Takashi's set - because i (goddamn) missed it. I'm ashamed, I apologise, it won't happen again. The set was a delicate minimal one - that he's been inching toward for a while now - and a sample of the nice can be gleaned from this:

Burial and Four Tet - Moth (MediaFire)

Matthew Dear - Some New Depression (MediaFire)

to this:

Gui Boratto - Eggplant (MediaFire)

Minilogue - Animal (Luciano remix) (MediaFire)

I arrived a few minutes into andrw's set. Good Golly Gosh. He wrapped me up.

Pryda - Reeperbahn (MediaFire)

The Field - Frantic Flow (Thomas Fehlmann Remix) (MediaFire)

andrw's techno is beautiful like a clear icy mountain spring pooling between bleached white rocks is beautiful: like 13 year old girls who haven't caught on to their own beauty are beautiful: like little, very green things are beautiful. It is paranoid because perfection can't last - we all get born sometime. But for now, for right now, the grainy expulsion of amniotic fluid is irrelevant. You're safe in Great Granny's womb - you're safe at Andrew's party. To be fair, it makes the neon-noobies uncomfortable. Apparently, you can't dance to it; its too gentle, too pure, too constant in its foundations to bounce off and stomp on. What they brightly forget is that you don't need to dance to a full basin of fresh water - you can dance in it.

After the Revery came Sound Sensible, Offbeat and Dexterity. These last three mishmashed a bit in my mind, but certainly flipped the party switch. Although not strictly techno, if you didn't have your glasses on you might have been mistaken. It was electronic and tangible, for the most part smooth, for the most part active. Dexterity's clkk-y woooop-y crk-y slth-y beats and smooth operator jaw line saw some serious titty-twitching to a perfectly populated (not packed) dance floor, ending the night with a feeling something like - "let's do that again."

Luckily for the titty-twitchers, and those whose titties require twitching - as well as those who want to spend a night in-utero with andrw plinking kindly over your clean parts - Kitchener's Carvery Bar is ready for your dance moves. The first next party will be on the Fifth of June, so make sure you get that stain off your booty shorts in time.

Join the facebook group:

Kitchener's Carvery Bar

Join the party.

Be happier than you were before.

Friday, May 22, 2009

Bananas And Ecstacy

Kitsuné 7, "The Lucky One", another installment from the fabulous fashionistas, is out (leaked) and led to my discovery of new favourites Tanlines from Brooklyn NY.

Tanlines - Bejan (MediaFire)

The Tough Alliance - A New Chance (Tanlines remix) (MediaFire)

Telepathe - Chromes On It (Tanlines remix) (MediaFire)

After hearing them, I couldn't resist digging out all my other neo-tropical pop & dance punk, balearic & cosmic disco and other friendly psychedelia that I've had in mind for a mix for quite some time now, but have had neither the tools nor enough tracks to complete.

My journey of discovering these sounds and putting them all together, oddly enough, started with the sun drenched, blissed-out, hazy psychedelia of dearest Panda Bear back in 2007.

Air France

Soon after, Swedes Air France followed with my belated uncovering of their EP On Trade Winds.

The Tough Alliance

They in turn somehow got me onto The Tough Alliance (also from Brooklyn). The beginning of the following year in 2008 saw the release of El Guincho's Alegranza.

El Guincho

Now, ever wondered what a rave might be like at a world music festival? Ever heard that soundtrack to that Brazilian movie City of God? Can you comprehend an album Manu Chao would make after falling in love with everything Animal Collective, especially the exquisite Person Pitch by Panda Bear? That's pretty much how one has to go about summing up this mind boggling mash-up of musical styles that Pablo Díaz-Reixa has fully realized under his El Guincho guise. Alegranza plays like some bastard mixtape of someone travelling the world, compiling and documenting with a sense of child like wonder, the various exotic music encountered along the way. Caribbean steel drums and Afro-beats, psychedelic Tropicália from the likes of Os Mutantes, doo-wop, calypso harmonies, even trance music. There was nothing as refreshing as this at the time. It induces you with an urge to go party the world over, the music breaking all language barriers. I fell in love with it instantly, still drooling over Panda Bear and it was a favourite for a long time. Low and behold who teams up? The old and the new: 

El Guincho - Kalise (Tanlines remix) (MediaFire)

Later that year Air France's  a w e s o m e  No Way Down EP came out.


Enter Lemonade, at the beginning of this year, of course hailing from Brooklyn too, but of what I could gather (at least according to what I saw on their Myspace) they used to be from San Franciso, California. They were probably surfing, smoking spliff on the beach (all coastal vibes), hanging out with friends, perhaps listening to Air France and El Guincho. Relocating to Brooklyn (again this is all pure speculation) they came into their own, whilst befriending and playing with their peers, the fellow Brooklynites mentioned above. (Visit RCRD LBL and download a whole heap of their stuff there for  free)

Lemonade - Big Weekend (Delorean remix) (MediaFire)

And so finally, thanks to all the loose ends being tied up as we speak and some other songs recently discovered, you can look out for this "sound" I speak of in my upcoming Bananas and Ecstacy mix round the end of the month. It all comes full circle on this tropical new wave - sunny California, Brooklyn, Sweden and Spain - featuring all these artists and more.

Fuck the cold. Winter sucks. Already I am clinging to every single sunnyside-up-song in pure denial.

Bonus: Friendly Fires - Skeleton Boy (Air France remix) (MediaFire)

It's summer elsewhere.

Wednesday, May 20, 2009

Parties: ARCADE - You're So Cool (Saturday, May 23, Cape Town)


Kid 84
Bruce Willis
Lapse & Belushi
Slash Dot Millionare


Gogo video
Diamond Rayy

The next ARCADE party's line-up looks as tight as ever.

The duo behind this trendsetting firmament sent some swell promos to wet your appetites.

First up, we have tagteam extraordinaire Lapse & Belushi's mix.

Our very own Headphone Junkie contributors are well ahead in the mixing game, coming from a predominantly hip-hop background dating back to when all the cool kids still lived in Durbs. They bring the same hunger for the freshest of tunes in the electro/indie dance scene today. Be sure to check out Lapse's own remixes and productions on his Myspace too. Damn tight!

Lapse & Belushi - It's Not A Buddy Comedy Mix (Mediafire)

Harder, better, faster, stronger than ever, the founder of the T.I.T.E.S. elite (a cutting edge series of bi-monthly themed Electro Punk parties) and prolific producer, Haezer, has been winning over the adoration of the electro scene in Cape Town with his stomping productions & remixes of The Dirty Skirts, kidofdoom and Yesterday's Pupil amongst others, setting a new standard for some healthy competition. Judging from his mix below, he's pretty much the closest thing we have locally of a banging Bloody Beetroots-type set too. Nice!

Haezer - Ugly People Dance Too (Mix) (zSHARE)

Haezer will be hitting Jozi soon too by the way. Just join the GRIET Fanpage on Facebook here to keep up to date with all his touring details.


The Dirty Skirts - Witches Bewitch Us (Haezer remix) (zSHARE)

Yesterday's Pupil - You'll Poly Die (Haezer remix) (zSHARE)

R.S.V.P. and more info for "You're So Cool" here.

Friday, May 15, 2009

Parties: This Is An Experiment (Friday, May 15, Johannesburg)

Tonight sees the (((SHAKE))) organizer throwing a new party in yet another strange but curious venue. This time round, along with trying out the new setting, the music played will come from a more left-of-center approach, to cater for a minimal/techno & "bass" crowd. Looking forward to this one, something different yet again and judging by the line-up, classy selections all night long.


Data Takashi
Sound Sensible

More info on Facebook here.

Thursday, May 14, 2009

Parties: Work It, Jerk It... Celebrate It - In The Club! (Thursday, May 14, Johannesburg)

Boom Monk Ben has been turning me onto some wicked cool stuff, ever since we first got a hold of him in anticipation of his sets in Jozi and Cape Town a while back.

And just as I was about to leave for home after a long working day to go take a bath and relax a little (I've been watching a dubstep documentary when I should've been sleeping) before I get my best bassface on for the first !DIRTY!DIRTY! tonight, lookie lookie!

My RSS feed subcription to Ben's Mixed Bizness pops up and I get this corker of a party starter to play in my car on the way to b'day boi Spoek's party!

Thunderheist - Jerk It (Megasoid Remix) (right click save as)

Thunderheist's sultry diva Isis' "sexytime explosion" rhymes over Grahm's booty shaking beats, is like mixing the soul of The Gossip with the spunk of Spank Rock (no wonder they're signed to Big Dada). Fellow Canadian duo Megasoid keeps it in the Ninja Tune family, turning up the turbo crunk and jerking it real good with their remix.

And as a bonus, for some early praise of a sooper fun night out at the most neon venue in town, whilst satisfying your inner Justin Timberlake undercover lover:

Claire Hux - Holy Ghost In The Club (MediaFire)

Label Feature: Soul Jazz

What do Allen Toussaint, Martyn, Kode 9, and Studio One all have in common besides a thumbs up from Boom Monk Ben? It may be a love of Fig Newton's, but more certainly, it's that they've all seen releases on Soul Jazz.

Martyn - The Only Choice (MediaFire)

A label I stumbled upon while looking for a reissue of Ernie K Doe's "Here Come The Girls", they're primarily a revivalist label focussing on reggae, via all it's forms and influences, through their 100% Dynamite and Studio One compilations.

They've gone on to expand their repertoire and venture more into influences and spawned genre territory with Steppas Delight, and the New Orleans Funk series. Add to this New York Noise (and the accompanying book), with some of the finest and most experimental dance music from 1980s New York, from the likes of Bill Laswell, Arthur Russell, and Liquid Liquid, and you have a label covering some of the most important tracks that have got us where we are today.

As if having an excellent label wasn't enough they've extended their reach even further with the Sounds of the Universe store, unearthing gems covering pretty much every genre you can think of, shipped in from literally every corner of the globe.

Mulatu Astatke & The Heliocentrics - Cha Cha (MediaFire)

Guest contribution by Ash

Most recent release on Soul Jazz Records, is the long anticipated, extremely well put together and a must own for anyone remotely interested in Dub and Dubstep, the Dub Visions Documentary.

Press Release

Artists featured in Dub Echoes DVD:

Kode9, Lee Perry, Congo Natty, King Jammy, Adrian Sherwood, U Roy, 2Many DJs, Bunny Lee, Roots Manuva, Don Letts, Mad Professor, Peter Kruder, Aba Shanti, Howie B, Adam Freeland, Sly & Robbie and many more!

This film marks both the 40th anniversary of the invention of Dub and the 20th anniversary of the death of King Tubby, the genius legend of this far-reaching musical revolution.

Dub Echoes is an amazing newly produced documentary about Dub and its influence on the development of contemporary electronic music worldwide. Three years in the making and featuring an incredible array of artists – both Jamaican legends (U Roy, King Jammy, Lee Perry, Sly and Robbie, Bunny Lee, to name a few), alongside a similarly awe-inspiring array of artists who have taken Dub into new directions in electronic dance music in the 21st Century (Kode9, Roots Manuva, Howie B, Adrian Sherwood) and many more.

Directed by Bruno Natal and released on Soul Jazz Records, this film has already received many awards throughout the world and is hotly anticipated – a killer film that can be watched again and again. The DVD comes with loads of extras and a limited-edition free poster in first 1000 copies.

You can buy the DVD here and to coincide with the release, a CD and 3xLP set, availeble to buy here.

[- Editor]

Wednesday, May 13, 2009

Belushi's Beloved - 011

Press Blurb: "comprised of two artists from two different  Gauteng electronic bands, they have merged to create a nu nufangled circuit bent etc, noise based project called Machette Jacobite... for now, this is all you need to know."

Whoever you are that emailed me this track, bravo I say "top track fellas and keep taking apart your toys."

Friday, May 08, 2009

What a waste of time...

I find the idea of looking at the world with drug-eyes appealing. An evening getting a second opinion on reality. At times it can be rewarding but I also know that it can be disastrous.

At a launch for a line of race-car tyres a couple of years ago, dosed to the gills on hippy-strength blotter-acid, I remember thinking (and at one point bellowing) "Jesus Christ! I'm surrounded by whores! How are they getting away with this in public?". I was awash with terror. Speechless in the corner of diner-style vinyl booth, I surveyed what I perceived to be the beating heart of the South African sex industry. "You've peaked. You'll be back to normal in a few hours", I told myself. I lied. It was a night of terror but I slithered from the experience the following evening reborn, having shed a few layers of fear.

Months later at the Louries, I watched awards being dished out while choking down a bag of mushrooms. Exposed to dangerously high levels of smug while in an altered state, I was rewarded. I saw people at their worst, under a harsh light, and laughed. At the very least, I gained a story to tell.

A couple of weeks ago I played my farewell set. The first 2 hours of the set were completely on target. People were having a good time. The pictures don't lie, it was a fun party. I wish I had been there.

The following are extracts from an email a friend of mine sent to a friend of his, describing what happened.

"Tonight started off alright, and as my DJ friend got going, I took my first pill. A few drinks in me, I was feeling fine, when the pill suddenly kicked in. After several moments of utter confusion as to what was going on, I realized that the “e” pill that I had ingested was actually ketamine. Several of my friends were in the same predicament, having been hit by something totally unexpected, and just as my friend’s set was starting to rock, Several of his friends were unable to stand up, let alone dance. I felt bad for him since I had promoted his party and so wanted to rock out to his music.
I remember you asked me to explain what I meant when I referred to a “level 3 ketamine trip” or whatever. Well, that’s basically what happened to me tonight. The idea is that in this state you completely lose your sense of what is real. More so than LSD, you almost even lose your capacity for language. Operating your body becomes an epic struggle. All the while you are wondering if people are perceiving you to be as fucked up as you actually are.

Later, as I was beginning to regain my senses, The music suddenly stopped. I was jarred...you know that “bad DJ moment” when you are rolling on e and it comes to a grinding halt. I looked up and was horrified to see that my friend had apparently taken the same pill as me, maybe 40 minutes later. He was completely catatonic at the decks, frozen, periodically peering at the computer screen from 2cm away. I immediately recognized the symptoms and rushed up to the stage and tried to talk him through it.

People started approaching the stage and asking what was going on. I explained that there were some “technical” difficulties. So there we stood, for 20 minutes, me trying to get through to him that he had to play something, it didn’t matter what at that point, and I had no idea about the software he was using. It turned out later that he only needed to hit the space bar on his keyboard to restart the music, but at the time it was an inaccessible mystery..."

I recorded the set. The intention was to do a post-party blog entry, mix attached. What I heard, hiding under my duvet the following day, made my blood chrystalise. There is a 20 minute gap. A track ends and then... nothing. Until at one point, the silence shatters. This is what broke it...

Mystery Track (Mediafire)

I have never heard this track before in my life. If anyone can tell me what it is, I'd welcome the information. I'd also like to know what the fuck it was doing on my computer in the first place because whether you enjoy this or not, you'll have to agree that it has no place in a Deep, Minimal Techno set. I can't imagine what was going through the minds of the dancers, I know there was absolutely nothing going through mine.

Thursday, May 07, 2009

Parties: Appulse - The VIRAL UNDERGROUND

| Richard The Third | Data Takashi | dirtyoldDisco |

| The Alternative Lounge | Sticky Antlers amongst others

A new and long overdue electro+ dance party is hitting the Pretoria underground - HARD - and its happening TOMORROW night. Local electro scene pioneers Electrotrash are injecting some influence too; so it's sure to be so infectious in fact, that it just might become part of a syzygy within a burgeoning scene where kidofdoom's post-Deep Space Champion-pop has become a catalyst, sending cosmic ripples into a thriving synergy of creativity that has recently seen a hard working Yesterday's Pupil join their ranks in swallowing up the sun and the moon among their contemporaries.

With a swift couple of clicks you can see the map here the flyer here and the event on Facebook here.


Tiga - Turn The Night On (MediaFire)
Friendly Fires - Lovesick (Evil Nine remix) (MediaFire)
Billy Newton-Davis - All My Dreams (Deadmau5 Mix) (MediaFire)


Skream - Trapped In A Dark Bubble (MediaFire)
Pantha Du Prince - Behind The Stars (MediaFire)

Tuesday, May 05, 2009

Grave Danger, Know the Truth!

If you’ve been wondering who’s been keying your car, letting the air out your tyres and keeping you up at night with bile fuelled bass thuds while you slumber.

I have your answer and you are not going to like it.

It’s these 2 evil, undead gnomes, that have have somehow climbed into the intestinal chambers of 2 friends (Magnum Hifi & Kid Colt) of mine and pilot their bodies to do unstoppable acts of evil.

Right now they are breaking into local club promoters houses while they sleep and hypnotising them into hiring only “Grave Danger” for any gig available. Any gig, I mean right now Grave Danger are playing everywhere and anywhere spreading their audio filth to unknowing revellers (wise up dickheads you're dancing to the devils music).

"The Faces of Pure Evil"

I remember the first time i heard them play, and also the nightmares I had that evening that can only be described as satan’s circus. But even worse is that nobody can get a gig in town, fucking nobody. They’ve turned a town full of dj’s into a town full of bedroom disc jockeys.

Now killing the 2 hosts (Magnum Hifi and Kid Colt) is not the answer, they will just transfer over to another couple of other Dj’s with worse music collections and that will make us all puke up our teeth.

We have to band together and stalk these evil gnome fuckwits, and kick them as hard as you possibly can square in the balls, because that’s the only way to kill a gnome.

"The Logo of Pure Evil"

I’ve included some rare footage of what these creatures look like when in the wild (link) as well as two mixes, in order for us to hear what audio terror these half-pint beasts are able to conjure up.

I’m trusting you to never, under any circumstances play these mixes backwards, please for the love of god this is serious and playing these mixes backwards would unleash an unimaginable evil onto our planet. Like fucking Derrick the Bandit x Infinity.

Grave Danger - Pushing Up Crazies Mix (MediaFire Older Mix)

Grave Danger - It's A Grave Rave Mix (MediaFire Newer Mix)

Monday, May 04, 2009

Belushi's Beloved - 010

Swedish bullying is at crisis point and Dada Life have released a single from their upcoming album "Just Do the Dada" in order to raise awareness levels of the scourge of the swedish school system, bullying and also to raise some much needed funds in order to maintain the bully abuse hotlines and bully abuse clinics.

Kudos to them for releasing such poignant track to tackle this brutality in swedish schools that leaves kids broken and on the verge of forging careers as dentists. It's common knowledge that the job arena in Sweden is massively over saturated with dentist/oral hygienists/orthodontists.

Hopefully these cats can help put an end to the bully infestation and the back alleys of Stockholm will no longer be lined with homeless with perfect teeth.

Here's the video to the track that heightens awareness of bully abuse, even if it's on a pure metaphorical level.

So don't go beating seven shades out of anybody Swedish this week, we want happy hands and happy feet.

Purchase at Beatport

I Love Me Some Pig & Dan...

In 1999 I was to know the taste of chronic dissatisfaction for the first time. This was the year that George Lucas was to use the world as his personal toilet by squeezing out "Star Wars Episode I" on his army of disciples. I was among them.

If there was any justice, he'd be throwing him away

Growing up I had heard countless yarns being spun about how life-changing watching "A New Hope" was back in 1977 and I wanted some of that for myself. I phoned Computicket for weeks in anticipation of the day when I could book tickets and buy myself a little slice of cinematic history. As soon as I was able to pry a date from those bastards, I woke up extra early, made myself a big flask of coffee and drove at top speed to my local ticket office. I was of course, the only one there.

When the woman who worked there finally arrived, I sheepishly stood behind her, sweating while she unlocked the door. I then followed her awkwardly to her workstation, waited for her computer to boot up and bought my tickets. One for myself for the opening morning and then a few for selected friends and I for the evening when I decided I could share "the magic" with others. I felt like I was buying porn. Now that I think about it, I also managed to get my hands on premier tickets for midnight the night before too. That's right, I would watch "Star Wars Episode I" 3 times in under 24 hours. Lucky me.

Imagine the supernova of shame and disappointment that must have torn through me as my heart died. You saw it. It stunk. "The Matrix" and "Lord of the Rings" didn't help much either.

Where movies have let me down though, music has come to my aid. There are certain artists that consistently deliver the goods with each new release. The delightfully named "Pig & Dan" are two guys who, unlike George Lucas, have never let me down.

Having met on flight to Spain in 1999 (irony?), Igor (Pig) & Dan (Dan) began crafting a sound for themselves, a sound now recognized worldwide as being loaded with an inherent sense of old-school fun and the capability to hammer-press a dancefloor. "Cubes" off the recent "Heat" EP is an artfully crafted example of what I'm getting at. A HUGE track with a little something for absolutely everybody.

Pig & Dan - Cubes (Mediafire)

While undoubtedly slotting neatly into the Progressive/Tech House category, "Cubes" never feels lame. Quite the opposite. There is an elasticated near-electro bassline, a driving beat, intermittent splinters of pure joy and moments of Nancy Drew-like mystery, all stitched together with surgical precision and iced with melancholy but there is definitely no cheese in this one.

Thank you Pig & Dan for being nothing at all like George Lucas. Thank you for giving us a taste of the past, infused with the present, making it massive and getting us to collectively gag for more. This is one to warm up a crowd and I am itching to play it for you.